In honour of Nurse’s Week and Mother’s Day, I asked a few lovely women to share their birth stories. They share sentimental memories and recall their interactions with nurses and other medical or support staff. Ultimately, the people who experience labour and birth are the best to learn from. There are summarized takeaways for birth workers at the end of the post. These are based on what was shared. Thank you to the incredible ladies who were willing to share!
*All stories are shared with permission. None are or have ever been patients of my own. Trigger warning- this post discusses PPD (postpartum depression).
Woman #1
I went into labour naturally at 40 weeks and 6 days. My birth story wasn’t terrible, but things did take a turn. I had painful contractions, spiked high blood pressure and a fever. My daughter’s heartbeat was elevated. When I was a child I was temporarily paralyzed, so getting an epidural was terrifying for me. I originally didn’t want one. The nurses were super kind about that. We tried other drugs & other methods to relieve pain. I was in so much pain that I was tensing up, slowing the process & we needed to get my baby out safely. An anesthesiologist talked to me and answered questions I had about an epidural. She was wonderful. She truly listened to me. She understood my concerns and educated me on how it worked and the likelihood of anything going wrong. The nurse held me for support while I got my epidural.
Baby girl was stuck on my pelvic bone during delivery so we were taken to the OR for a forceps delivery. The baby was delivered healthy and safe. I had abnormal blood pressure and was on antibiotics for an infection, so we spent an extra night in the hospital. The L&D (labour and delivery) staff was amazing. They asked first before doing anything and explained everything to me. They made me feel more confident in something I’ve never done before. They weren’t judgemental. They gave me all the love & support.
I am thankful for the hospital and medical staff!
Woman #2
I had a great nurse who stayed with me all day. She was super nice and patient! I liked that she let me lie down and close my eyes. I also liked when she talked to me about different things to get my mind off of the contractions. She was amazing! It just helps a lot when they give lots of smiles and advice!!
Woman #3
I laboured for 39 hours with my babe. I started labour at 6 pm. The afternoon of the next day, I was started on a Pitocin drip because my labour was not progressing. I had a nurse 1:1 with me. I had a GP following me during my pregnancy that was delivering my babe. She also had a student with her at the time. They were phenomenal. The doctor was encouraging, instructing, and supporting me through the whole 2 hours of pushing. Her student had a warm basin of water and was applying warm wet compresses after each and every contraction/push. A nurse was replacing the water for her when it was cooling down or running out. The doctor was also applying some form of lubricant to the perineal area, hoping to reduce the risk of tears.
As a first-time mom, my nurse was everything I needed during that time. She stood by my head to comfort and encourage me through it all. I swear she knew what I needed before I did. I had a couple of other nurses running around, refilling my ice chips, rubbing my neck, etc. They were amazing.
Baby’s head was stuck in the birth canal for so long. An OB (obstetrician) came by around the 2-hour mark of pushing. She offered an episiotomy to make it go faster but completely supported my decision when I said I didn’t want one. She came to the head of the bed and helped me pull my knees up as high as they would go during a contraction. She got my baby out for me on that contraction!
Shift change had happened while I was pushing. Night nurses were coming in to replace day staff, but several day shift nurses stayed late to help me deliver. One even stayed and took pictures for us once she was born. They stayed because they knew I needed their familiar faces. I was genuinely so exhausted and scared. I remember wondering if my baby was ever going to come out. It was so reassuring having those girls who I’d come to trust stay and support me like that.
“They may forget your name, but they will never forget how you made them feel.”
Woman #4
I can’t express how grateful I was to have such an amazing nurse during my labour. She was incredibly caring and made me feel safe and comfortable. I remember being afraid and exhausted, but she helped me push through. I really felt like she was giving me strength when I had none left within me. She’s someone I will never forget and can’t thank her enough.
Woman #5
During my whole pregnancy, no one talked to me about PPD (postpartum depression). When it happened after the baby was born I did not know what was happening. I’ve been depressed before but this was different. I didn’t want to take care of my baby, I didn’t want to live and I regretted having a baby. I wanted this baby and was excited before he was born. After he was born, I thought I ruined my life. It went away after a while and I love him so much, but it was super hard. No one educated me on the effects of postpartum, the way your hormones can make you feel and how bad it could be. I was not asked in the hospital how I felt mentally and cried a lot. I was completely blindsided by these feelings. If we were educated on PPD prenatally, I could have been more prepared to have irrational thoughts and feelings. I thought I would hate my life and hate being a mother forever. Mothers definitely need more mental health support.
Woman #6
One day before my due date, I went into labour! I was excited and ready to have this baby! My labour started with little contractions that kept me up all night, pacing the floor, taking showers, baking, etc. The next morning, I decided they were close enough together. My grandmother drove me to the hospital!
The nurses already knew me up on the Maternity/Women’s Health Floor, because my mom was recovering there after having a mastectomy. The nurses checked me and said it wasn’t time to have the baby yet. They advised me to stay close by. I went to my moms’ room and we had breakfast, read the newspaper and visited with her friends while we waited. Everyone was so excited about this new life about to enter the world and about my mother being declared cancer free!!
It was around 1:00 pm when my water broke! Finally. There was meconium coming out with the fluid. I asked for an epidural for the contractions. The nurses had to reposition me due to my baby’s heart rate and my blood pressure dropping drastically. All the moving pulled my epidural catheter tubing out. We did not realize until I was in so much pain. I felt white-hot pain, head to toe. I felt like even my hair hurt. You can imagine at this point I was feeling pretty panicked. The only thing that saved me is the angels that were my nurses. I began having panic attacks and forgetting to breathe. You tend to hold your breath when you’re uncomfortable. My beautiful nurse leaned over me and gave me a pep talk. She reminded me why I was going through this and encouraged me to picture my baby at the end of all of it. She helped hold the face mask with gas to calm me down. The doctors discussed an emergency cesarean section because of my baby’s heart rate.
In the end, I gave birth to a healthy and beautiful baby boy at 11:46 PM on my due date! My nurse stayed long after her shift ended. She helped me breastfeed my baby for the first time in the recovery room. I honestly could not have gotten through that experience without the nurses. Them giving me pep talks, holding my hand and comforting me was reassuring- not only to me but to my mom and my grandmother who met them too. I thank god every day for maternity nurses.
conclusion
Each story here is unique and amazing. Thank you to the strong and brave women that kindly shared their stories with me. Happy Nurse’s Week to care providers and Happy Mother’s Day to all the moms out there! You’re all amazing!!
I put together a few takeaways from these stories. I hope care providers in birth work will gain from reading this. These are things people remember and are thankful for because when they’re scared and exhausted, the little details matter.
Takeaways
-Going the extra mile to provide comfort can change everything. Offer to turn down the lights, rub their back, help them tie their hair up, hold a cool cloth on their forehead, and fan cool air on them between pushes.
-Always ask for consent. This should be a no-brainer, but sadly, it gets missed at times. Look into how you can practice “trauma-informed care.”
-Explain what you’re doing. You know what you’re doing and why because this is your job. The birthing person probably doesn’t know but wants and deserves to know.
-Smile. Even when things are hectic, your smile means a lot to the person you’re providing care to.
-Provide reassurance. Reassurance goes a long way in helping people find their strength.
-Have in-depth conversations with mothers about their mental health and support systems available to them. Mental health needs to be taken into consideration more often!
– Be educated on methods to benefit patient outcomes and use them/suggest their use. (i.e. oil or warm compresses to minimize the risk of tearing)
-Women find comfort in familiar faces. If you can stay a little later to help them, do it! If you can resume care of a patient you’ve cared for previously and have a good therapeutic relationship with- you should. This can be referred to as “continuity of care.”
